Inappropriate things to say to a woman who is more than nine months pregnant. ‘You are huge!’ ‘How wonderful’ ‘what a great time’ ‘You make me so nostalgic for when I was pregnant, I loved it’.
Topics that are quite safe to bring up: cravings.
My body started to demand extra calories as soon as it realised it was growing another person and I remained ravenous for the first three to four months.
Chocolate – I started to crave chocolate right from the start and a Bounty or revels or Green & Blacks were essential for after dinner. I wasn’t a huge chocolate fan before that, preferring vanilla treats or biscuits. I would happily have swapped chocolate cake for creme brulee or pavlova without question.
I had morning sickness for about four months and sometimes the foods I craved were the only ones that stopped the nausea.
Pizza – for a couple of weeks I craved Dominos which was a bit of a problem as I had avoided it for two years previously. Boycotts be damned, I finished nearly an entire large pizza to myself the first time I ordered – I left one piece of the BBQ sauce, mushroom, onion, olive and sweetcorn pizza.
KFC – I had been boycotting this fast food chain for the last three years and swore I would not have any again until they had at least one item that was either free range or organic. I felt so ill however that I had to have it but it was just the once.
Tuna / fish – for two weeks I fancied, tuna, white fish, fish pie, anything to do with fish. There is a limit to how much tuna or oily fish you can eat so I had to limit myself.
Fruits / vegetables – for another two weeks I would have a constant need to have fruit and vegetables. I would wake up in the morning and make a smoothie of oranges, apples, grapes, strawberries and whatever other fruit I had bought the previous day.
Custard – For about a month I had to have a big bowl of custard every night using cow’s milk. Ordinarily, I am lactose intolerant but one day the online shopping order from Asda included a six pint size of semi-skimmed milk and by the end of that week I had finished nearly all of it with my custard indulgence.
Bacon – From the end of October until the end of December I had a constant craving for bacon. I don’t think it was a coincidence that my iron levels dropped dramatically around then. During December I would buy a bacon roll from the Pasty shop at Bristol Temple Meads and they are exceptionally good.
Beef – for the first three months I couldn’t eat beef but it became a constant in my life from November (see above).
Fruits / cake – January has been about fruit and cake mostly. Krispy Kreme donuts and vanilla cake – like Victoria Sponge or Madeira cake. The fruit has been mostly about oranges and cherries although grapes, apricots and nectarines have featured as well.
I read that cravings come after the baby takes whichever nutrients it needs from the mum’s body and then your system goes ahead and replenishes them. I had heard tales of women losing teeth or just having them disintegrate during pregnancy ( a tooth a pregnancy goes the old saying) so I was happy to follow any suggestion my body made.
Other topics that are safe: the cot.
It has finally been put up thanks to my housemate and only a slight amount of swearing.